Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
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