She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
