Dual....:-)
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
