is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
She is in my trunk
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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