Rock
Scissors
Fuck
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize