That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
