your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
