omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
