You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
