i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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