i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
