at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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