You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability