This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Randomize
