he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
