I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
