It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
