this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
