i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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