I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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