That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
