Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
