I just pynch a tree in the face
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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