I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
