come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
