Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
