Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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