So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
