I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize