Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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