I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
this will be a night to untag.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize
