her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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