Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
