so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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