these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
why do cheetos always look like penises
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
