someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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