Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Randomize
