god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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