Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
