Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
