chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize