i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
