Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize
