Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
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