I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
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