We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I said "one day" and that day is not today
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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