Don't you send me to vm
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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