Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
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