i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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