he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
