this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I just had sex on a roof
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
